Monday, 29 May 2017

Don’t Forget These Things As You Come Out Of A Bad Relationship

They say that in life there are no failures, only lessons. And nowhere is this truer than in the case of a breakup from a bad relationship. Even though there is always a lot of pain and suffering involved in the process, there are some very important things you should not forget as you come out of it.

Overcome A Bad Relationship Bearing These Things In Mind

Even though on paper you may know that your relationship was not the best for you, it still hurts undergoing such a difficult change and dealing with the heartbreak of losing someone you used to love. Whether it was your decision to end things or not, you should not forget the following things:

#1. It’s no good staying in a relationship that’s not making your life better. Why do we search for someone to share our lives with if they can’t make us happy? When a relationship actually makes your life worse, for example, due to constant bickering, what’s the use in keeping it?

#2. Good relationships make things seem easy. Bad relationships, on the other hand, make everything seem hard. A very serious sign of a strong relationship is that you and your partner are on the same page in life, not constantly struggling to make things work and compromising on every single thing. If a relationship is too much hard work, it’s probably not meant to be.

#3. A bad relationship may leave you wounded, but it’s also an opportunity to improve yourself. Yes, it is true that you can’t escape the pain of breaking up. However, it is also true that our experiences shape us, they give us more insight into who we are and what we need and they make us wiser and more aware of our own desires.

#4. You are lucky to be away from someone who wasn’t right for you.  Even if it was her decision to end the relationship and not yours, it is clear she wasn’t the one for you after all. There is, however, someone out there who is a better match for you. All you have to do is pull yourself together and go out looking for her.

Even bad relationships are still our relationships and there are bound to be some precious moments we will always keep close to our hearts after they end. Give yourself the time to heal and overcome the breakup, don’t rush into a new relationship you’re not sure you even want, but don’t take too long grieving over what is lost either because life is too short to spend it dwelling on the past.

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Thursday, 25 May 2017

Experts Single Out The Absolute Worst Relationship Advice

Relationships are complicated things. From their start to their (unfortunate) end, they confuse us, make us wonder if we’re doing things right, and they often cause us a great deal of insecurity about the way we’re handling them. This is why we seek advice wherever it may be available – frequently falling victims to some of the worst relationship advice there is. Relationship experts offer insight into the reasons these pieces of advice are actually bad for you.

How Much Of The Worst Relationship Advice Have You Been Following?

The worst thing about the pieces of advice characterized by experts as bad for you is that they sound perfectly logical. But this is what the experts had to say about each of them.

Happy couples don’t have arguments.

Andrea Syrtash, a relationship expert and the author of “He’s Just Not Your Type (And That’s a Good Thing) says of this piece of advice: “It’s not that you fight, but how you fight that determines the health and happiness of a relationship. If you never fight or disagree with your partner, one of you may be harboring resentments.”

So, it’s ok to fight, you just need to know the way to do it right (as we’ve mentioned before).

The only kind of real romantic love is love at first sight.

“Some people fall in love at first sight. Others sit next to the same person at the office for years and feel nothing — until, one day, they do. The advice I’d give people is to really learn to listen to themselves.

And if an answer isn’t immediately apparent, check in with your body. I once heard a yoga instructor say that your head can lie to you, but your body never will. I’ve found that to invariably true and useful in all areas of life — especially relationships” said Ellen McCarthy, Washington Post reporter and the author of “The Real Thing“.

Some people fall in love at first sight, but if you have developed feelings for your best friend, it is still real and it may even be the foundation of a stronger kind of relationship.

Online stalking will prevent your involvement with the wrong kind of person.

Having access to a person’s social media accounts or e-mail may seem like a quick and reliable way to check up on them constantly, but at what cost for your relationship?

Dating coach Emyli Lovz says on the matter: “First off, if someone gives you this advice, take a look at the quality of that person’s relationship before you follow in their footsteps.

If you cannot trust your partner, then you’ve already chosen the wrong one. The bigger question is why you are attracted to a person whom you do not trust. Put simply, snooping destroys trust, which is the foundation of a healthy relationship.”

Honesty is always the best policy.

We don’t mean to advocate being a liar, but there is a fine line between being sincere and being insensitive. There are certain truths you should tell, and others that are completely useless; harmful even.

According to Joseph Burgo, psychotherapist and author of “The Narcissist You Know: “There’s also a difference between major deception and the ‘white lies’ everyone tells to spare another person’s feelings.

Speaking a truth that needlessly wounds your partner’s self-esteem will only make them defensive or provoke them to say something unkind in return. Sometimes it’s better to be tactful than completely honest.”

We hope we set the record straight about these seemingly wise tips that really constitute the worst relationship advice you can follow. The best thing a person can do to make sure they are not being misled is to follow the words of experts.

*You can read the original article that inspired us to write this here.

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Monday, 22 May 2017

Are You A Romantic Or A Realist And How Does That Affect Your Love Life?

Surely, nothing in life is black and white and people are multi-faceted beings, made up of a number of different characteristics. However, there are two basic categories most of us tend to fall into, weighing the scales down either on one side or the other. One can either be more of a romantic or a realist – which one are you?

Find Out If You’re A Romantic Or A Realist

There is no right way or wrong way to be, both realists and romantics have important qualities that guide them in life, shape their beliefs, help them overcome problems and largely decide what kind of person they end up with. Here are the characteristics of both, so you can decide for yourself which describes you best.

The Main Traits Of A Romantic

A romantic has an ideal view of what a relationship should be. He is the kind of person who refuses to compromise and wants it all or nothing. For the romantic, a partner should have the brains of Einstein, the body of Emily Ratajkowski and the heart of an angel. Romantics tend to value surprises and spontaneity and get bored quite easily.

Even though they view love as the most important thing, they will be the ones to leave a relationship if they feel the romance is gone, and they get disappointed easily when things are not as ideal as they want them to be. This is why romantics can be high-maintenance and quite hard to predict. On the other hand, they are exciting partners and don’t hold back on their feelings, thus making a relationship with them intense and unforgettable.

The Basic Characteristics Of A Realist

Realists, on the other hand, understand that there is no such thing as a “perfect relationship” and know that some practical considerations are equally important as passion and romance for two people to be in a happy relationship. They largely accept their partners for who they are and prefer to adjust their life to their needs and abilities. A relationship with a realist will be a stable one, where what you see is what you get.

However, do not expect fireworks and surprises, as realists prefer to be more calculated than spontaneous. This is why they sometimes end up boring their partners or find themselves in lackluster relationships with a monotonous sex life and too much predictability.

Whatever your main trait, it is clear that both sides have their pros and cons. A good idea is to try to strike some kind of balance between the two, so you have an exciting love life that is, however, not abandoned in the hands of passion and spontaneity.

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Thursday, 18 May 2017

Make Peace With The Fact You’ll Never Be Enough

There’s a word out there, a simple word we use quite frequently, whose insidiousness lies in its vagueness. What does it mean to be “enough”? In our competitive and ever-changing world, can anyone ever be enough?

Why You’ll Never Be Enough

The simple answer to why you will never be enough is that the things you have to be good enough at change all the time. And they are so subjective and undefined; one can never measure up to them. It’s like trying to score a goal in a football field with moving goalposts. The minute you reach them, they move somewhere else.

For your parents, perhaps you’re not attentive enough, for your boss you are probably not hard-working enough, for your friends you may not be present enough and for your lover you may not be romantic enough, beautiful enough, clever enough – the list goes on.

So What If You’ll Never Be Enough?

The trouble with not being enough starts with the fact we measure ourselves and base our own self-esteem on the way others see us. People are not the same, though. A lover may like your madness while another might ask you to tone it down; some might appreciate your total honesty while others may be offended by it.

There’s one thing to realize that will set you free from the struggles to prove your worth to others: you can’t be liked by everyone. Do you even want to? Why should you even care?

When you accept the fact that even the concept of perfection is a subjective notion – who’s to say what is perfect anyway? – you will feel heave a massive sigh of relief.

Accept who you are: a big bundle of experiences, mistakes, feelings, failed relationships, wins and defeats, sins and good deeds, and a whole lot of love to offer and find people who will recognize and embrace the real you.

Your true, genuine, self is all you can be.

And that is more than enough.

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Monday, 15 May 2017

If You’ve Been Ghosted, This Is How To Leave Negative Feelings Behind

Unless you’ve been hiding under a big rock lately, you will most likely have heard of “ghosting”. If you’re in the dating game and have only heard of the term rather than experienced it first-hand, consider yourself lucky. But in the opposite case, in the unlucky event you’ve been ghosted, there’s no reason to despair.

What To Do If You’ve Been Ghosted

There is no doubt that having someone remove themselves from your life all of a sudden and without any kind of explanation is a hurtful experience. But even for those of us who have been ghosted, there is a way to get over the bitterness and hurt that follow. These are the simple steps to take.

Step 1: Understand why you’re hurt. Most cases of ghosting happen with people we don’t know very well. Those who know us well are far less likely to pull a disappearing act, partly because they are part of our circle of friends and family and would be reluctant to do so even if they wanted to. So, one thing to consider is whether you’re unhappy because you miss the person who has ghosted you, or because your ego has taken a blow. If it’s just your ego, take comfort in the knowledge you’ll get over the pain soon – as soon as you get the attention you deserve again.

Step 2: Accept your pain. Whatever the cause, we should never deny ourselves of the right to feel pain. Even if the relationship was brief, even if it was an online relationship with someone you hadn’t had the chance to meet yet, you had probably invested in them and the potential future you could have together. Let yourself grieve for as long as you need to because to keep your suffering bottled up will only do more harm down the line.

Step 3: Discuss it with someone you trust. They say that a problem shared is a problem halved, and even though no one can feel your pain for you, putting your thoughts into words is therapeutic in itself. Moreover, a third person’s opinion is more removed and objective and could potentially help you see things from a different perspective.

Step 4: Treat yourself with love. Eating well, trying to sleep well, taking exercise and doing activities you enjoy show how much you care about yourself. Don’t let another person’s lack of respect for you make your self-esteem wane one bit. When you feel disrespected, make up for it by giving yourself even more respect than before. You may not be in the mood for much at first, but you are bound to feel a lot better in time.

Step 5: Get back on the horse. After you’ve allowed yourself the time to take stock of the situation and accept what has happened, you should not waste time moving on. Yes, you will worry it might happen again, and no, no one can rule out the possibility, but living in fear is no way to live one’s life. Every relationship involves a certain amount of risk and you will be forgiven for keeping some parts of yourself to yourself, but dating is another case of “nothing ventured, nothing gained”.

You may never understand why the person who ghosted you chose this kind of behavior, but, at the end of the day, how others treat us is not about who we are but about who they are.

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Thursday, 11 May 2017

Everybody Agrees This Is The Most Attractive Behavior

Even though our appearance is very important as it’s the first thing to catch the eye of our object of desire, the role that our personality and general attitude play is even more important in the long term.  Good looks may grab someone’s attention, but it’s only through our attractive behavior that we can keep it.

The Simple Tricks To Showing Your Most Attractive Behavior

Showing your best side is not about pretending, it’s about focusing on your best qualities and projecting your best sides. So, there’s no need to change yourself, all you need to do it cultivate the sides of you that you’re most proud of. Here’s what most people are attracted to.

#Smile widely.  And smile as much as you can. It doesn’t matter if you don’t have the smile of a model, a genuine smile will make your eyes shine and send the most positive signals to others. It is a sign that a person will be happy by your side and that you can overcome any problem more easily than a pessimist who dwells on the negative aspect of things.

#Pay attention to what people say. The art of listening is something of a lost art these days, with people so focused on their own troubles and worries. A good listener who is not just waiting for his turn to speak but genuinely takes into account what is said (even when he disagrees with it) is a rare find and, thus, someone people want to interact with.

#Be kind. Being kind is not synonymous with being a victim, despite what some might say. Being kind is a sign of confidence and magnanimity, as a giver is someone who’s not afraid of losing what he has and recognizes the gratification that comes with offering to others. As a bonus, people are drawn to kindness and generosity.

#Be trustworthy. One of the most attractive attributes is being dependable. Whether as a friend or as a lover, a person on whom people can rely is a person they will want to be around. Trustworthiness is, without a doubt, a real ‘must’ when you want to draw the attention of a woman.

#Be confident. From your body language to the way you talk, there is probably nothing more charming than oozing confidence. Being proud of who you are also makes you attractive to the eyes of others too, as it automatically convinces them that you have a lot going for you.

#Don’t forget your manners. Being a classy gentleman is a sure-fire way to impress the ladies. It is not one single thing, but rather a way of handling yourself and others in a fashion that’s respectful and decent.

Even if you struggle with some of the things that make up this attractive behavior at first, practicing them will ultimately make you not only more irresistible, but also a better person.

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Monday, 8 May 2017

Chinese Engineer Builds His Dream Robot Wife, And Then Marries Her

What do you do when you get sick and tired of looking for the perfect partner to no avail? For those of us who have been somewhat unlucky in love, there is only one thing we can do: keep looking. But Chinese Artificial Intelligence expert Zheng Jiajia chose differently. He decided to build his robot wife from scratch.

Why Did He Choose A Robot Wife Instead Of A Real Woman?

31-year-old Zheng Jiajia, an AI expert who is a former Huawei employee and currently creates robots in Hangzhou, China, felt utterly disappointed with his dating experiences. Unable to find a human companion to his liking, he created his dream “female” robot at the end of last year, reports South China Morning Post.

He named the robot Yingying, and has so far enabled her to identify Chinese characters and images, and even say a few simple words – though whether “I do” is among them remains unknown.

For now, she can only communicate with her creator/ husband, which is somewhat strange since Zheng has made his robot wife the official spokesperson of his company: a startup named “Brain of Things”, according to Mashable. However, Zheng is planning to upgrade his robot wife so she will soon be able to walk and help out with household chores, so maybe even more updates that will make Yingying more sociable are on the way too.

An Unusual Ceremony

The Chinese eccentric “married” his creation in a “simple” ceremony (whatever that means, considering the situation), according to reports. Following the Chinese tradition, Yingying was in a black suit on the day and “her” head was covered with a red scarf during the Chinese wedding ritual, which was also attended by Zheng’s mother and his friends. It should be noted, however, that this type of unconventional wedding is not legally binding (at least not yet).

Whether this is a publicity stunt to draw attention to his own company, or a guy’s sincere and desperate effort to find love in the mechanical eyes of his robot wife remains to be seen. In his interview with Pear Video, the man himself said: “My dream of making my own spouse finally came true. I want to see robots in every home, and ultimately I want to build a realistic robot girlfriend.”

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Thursday, 4 May 2017

Should You Share Passwords With Your Partner?

As times change, so do the issues and dilemmas faced by couples. In the digital age, one very real concern all people in stable relationships have to deal with at some point is whether it’s a good idea to share passwords with their partner or not.

The Arguments Of Those Who Do Share Passwords

Those who ultimately decide to share passwords with their better half say they feel very comfortable doing so. The premise behind their decision is that a person who has nothing to hide can share everything. If you are not exchanging messages with your exes or having little chats with your attractive colleague from the office, why would you want to keep the interactions (or lack thereof) undisclosed?

These people will pick up their partner’s phone when it rings, read his or her text messages (and maybe respond to some too), and sometimes even have access to their bank accounts. To their mind, this is nothing but a sign of a trusting, healthy relationship, where everything is out in the open and no one has any secrets.

The Arguments Of Those Who Don’t

Couples who decide against sharing passwords are the people who believe that trust means not having to check on your partner. They are the people who say there is no need to constantly check your partner’s e-mail and Facebook account looking for secret messages.

In their view, the very fact a partner needs to pick up your phone when there’s an unknown number when it rings means that they feel insecure in the relationship and there is a lack of trust between them.

Those who decide not to share passwords with their partners say that even when we are in a relationship, we still need our privacy and space to breathe.

So, What’s The Verdict?

As with most things relationship-related, there is no right and wrong answer here. Whether you want to share passwords is a very personal choice, at the end of the day. One thing that’s for sure, however, is that you should only do it if you are both in agreement that it’s something you want to do. And another thing, bear in mind that a partner who wants to stray will find a way to do it, even if it means sending smoke signals.

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